A Few Thoughts About Windows

It's no wonder I feel cheated! We paid thousands and by that, I mean THOUSANDS of dollars for new windows in our house. And more than half the work was already there! When we bought our house, it had windows. And if you believe the dictionary, when we replaced them, all we got was the glass! See for yourself. Here's the definition.

window, noun
1.
an opening in the wall of a building, the side of a vehicle, etc., for the admission of air or light, or both.

I mean if they were just going to sell us the stuff to fill the opening, shouldn't we have paid less? Okay. I know that to some, the window is the thing that fills the hole. And If I'd specified a "Stained-glass" window, I could see being on the hook for that. But I just wanted windows. And if they'd filled in the openings and carefully cut new ones for the "windows," I suppose I'd be on the hook for that too. But they only made new frames with double glass to fill the openings. I mean...I could've done that!

But they were on sale. And the salesman was so charming and disarming with his little joke about the end of the sale. He said we only had a small "window" of opportunity. We thought that was so cute. He practically had the little woman eating out of the palm of his hand. And that's another thing. He didn't have a Palm in his hand. It was an HP and it used mobile XP, yet another kind of Window! And when I looked at it, I could see the photo of our living room with the new window overlaid. It was a powerful selling tool. If only it weren't part of the bigger lie!

I remember it as though it were October. (which it was) We had been watching a launch of the shuttle. And the launch window was about to close. It was now or never. That damned launch "window" got us so excited, that we'd have bought just about anything from that smooth-talking salesguy. It felt like Karma. We had a small window of opportunity to buy our windows as demonstrated on his Windows XP, HP, with only a small window of opportunity. Fate was making us sign the deal. And the clincher was that he wasn't going to deposit the check until Tuesday, giving us a "window" of time in which we could make sure it was covered.

We were so naive...which by the way, is Evian spelled backwards. So if you overpay for your water the way we did for windows, you deserve what's coming to you.

So the next time you need your windows replaced, heed this warning. Make certain you are getting everything you paid for. Ours are double-paned and double hung, but I swear they only did it once. And what about the sash? There's no sash! (What the hell is the sash?!?) There's just some double-hung, double-paned, hole-filling ripoffs that I bet I could've found for less at the Home Depot if only fate hadn't intervened.

One final thought. They say "the eyes are the windows of the soul." Well. I wear glasses. You know, little window frames around glass? My windows to the soul have windows and I probably overpaid for those too. And buyer beware, God uses the old sills!